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Now this is hard for me to write about because not even my closest friend knows this about me, but i was never really a socially awkward child but as the years have gone by i have seemed to grow (not sure if that's the right term to use but it seems to fit for me) socially awkward.
The other week i was out with my mum having lunch and she asked me to pay while she went and answered a phone call and i couldn't move from my seat to go up to the counter and pay for it so instead i sat there froze and waited for my mum to come back and she just called me stupid and told me to grow up. Other things similar to this like going to pay for something in a shop, or going into a shop and asking for a job, or even asking for directions make my heart beat fast and make my hands go all sweaty and my voice goes all weird. Now i feel like i can't even talk to my mum or my friend because they would both tell me I'm being stupid and over thinking things but i know that's not it! i know that there is a reason i can't do the simple things anymore without feeling like i am going to burst into tears. I cant even meet new people because i cant hold a full conversation anymore, i cant do so many things just because of this! I don't know if it's something i have done or if there's something i could of done to stop it from happening.
No one else i know goes through this so i feel all alone all the time!
Do any of you have any advice for me because at the moment i feel like i cant leave the house without someone by my side to help me! how am i meant to live on my own when i can't ask a stranger for directions, or when i can't go pay for a coffee! what am i meant to do?!?
I know this isn't a normal post i would do but at the moment I'm struggling with this more than ever.
If any of you struggle with the same thing i would love to talk to you and get some advice??
Thank you
Just Another Girl xxx
I'm sorry to hear that you feel like this :( Maybe try doing one small thing a day that's out of your comfort zone and then build your way up to doing bigger things. You should tell your mum how you feel so she understands xxx
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Thank you, i might try that although i don't think i'm ready to have that conversation with my mum yet! xxx
ReplyDeleteI used to be the same. And in some ways/ certain situations I still am. You know what you should do? You should visualize the way you want to interact with other people. See yourself not being socially awkward in those situations. I've done it, and it has helped me greatly. It sounds crazy, but it works.I promise.
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I'm Glad i am no the only one that has felt like this! I'm going to try that tomorrow then since iv'e got to be brave and get the train on my own to meet my mum! Thank You xxx
DeleteI completely understand this, I'm really similar. When I talk to people, it feels like my awkwardness spreads to them. For me, it's so obvious to everyone that I feel uncomfortable being around them. It's such a difficult thing to talk about but it's only way to feel okay again. If you can find someone you trust and someone you know will be there for you, the best thing to do is to talk because if it's someone who cares about you they will do what they can. I know it seems like this is just advice that won't help you but I know how it feels and when you're ready, you should talk about it. Hope you're okay xx
ReplyDeleteThank you! xxx
DeleteSorry I don't have any advice (usually I do) but everything you described is literally how I describe myself. Just know that you're not alone, as I am the definition of social awkwardness! Xx
ReplyDeleteNot everyone would have advice but it's nice to know that i'm not alone and other people go through it too! xxx
DeleteHey, I know exactely how you feel and have been in your situation a few years ago. I must admit its not the easiest thing to do.. To step out of your comfort zone but its apart of life to make silly mistakes and try new things.
ReplyDeleteI know you said you didnt want to talk to anyone but honestly thats the best way forward. To have someone who will guide you and be there for you to give you that word of encouragemet. Talk to your friend so that you two can begin to make a plan on how to help you grow out of being socially awkward. If you need more detailed advice, feel free to email me :) xx
Might be late to comment, but may you take care. I've had this problem, and it developed out of no where like I could ever think it would do. This was, when I realized, that people didn't care or really think before they said or did anything and at the time, it was a grieveing time. Although it is not the same as your issue, I started to gain something I liked in my own time, then it came to going outdoors and gradually socialising. I made myself step out, breath slowly, got the help I could look for and take myself step by little step out of my comfort zone.
ReplyDeleteIt's truly scary at first, but take that little courage that you may find and take it step by step. Also, I'm sorry that you're not able to tell your mom, it looks as if it past on from an discouraged comment, to tell your friends. Out of comfort zone again, any communication format, tell your friends in time in that way. I did this and I couldn't believe how supportove and knowledgeable they were. I do hope they help you. Sometimes parents do that, you're not the only one. They'll realise their fault in their own time. I'm sorry if this is long, but also you may feel courage to give this/post to your friends too, in you're own time always. Always try not to think how they may view what you say, wait for them to tell you.
You could do so well. And take care once more. Experiences are some of the lessons that we can learn and conquer. Solutions are all around us. Contact in anyway that you feel best.
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It's never too late to comment all the help/Advice is very much needed! Thank you xxx
DeleteI don't know if this is that kind of thing, but I know that just practicing interacting with people has helped me a lot! I can be super awkward - I have trouble holding conversations with new people, too, so every time that I'm in a situation like that, I tell myself that I need the practice and just go for it. I've had to get used to the fact that, most of the time, those interactions are awkward. I just keep trying, knowing that eventually I'll get better at people!
ReplyDeleteI've never experienced the whole freezing up thing, though. I don't know much about it, but I have a couple friends who have struggled with anxiety, so maybe that could be a possibility?
Also, if you're feeling worried about talking to your mom and friends about what's going on, you could try writing them a letter! When I have something really scary that I need to talk about, that's usually what I do. It helps me get my thoughts in order and keeps me from having to go through a face-to-face confrontation.
I hope this helps! Let me know if you need anything, for real. I'd be more than willing to talk!
Thank you! I really appreciate it :) xxx
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